Skip to main content

Perhaps Its Contagious


I noticed today, while rolling over on my couch trying to find some sense of relief, that my bear looks exactly how I feel.

He's hunched over and looks like he is very done with the day. Me too Mr. Bear. Me too.

Today started out so good. I had this little burst of energy that diminished by the time I had eaten breakfast and started on my reading homework... maybe I just never need to pick up another book.

And so I shifted back into my regular routine of rubbing essential oils on my face, getting my diffuser going, altering the lighting and reading what I could. Then the routine continued on to my decision to take some medication, realizing this migraine could get really bad really quick.

By the time I finished the one small errand I had for the day, I was completely nauseated, could barely see, and couldn't stop shaking. You know, it is awfully hard to prepare lunch when you just want to throw up. Let alone eat the prepared lunch, knowing eating it will make me feel better, but knowing it just might not stay down.

So maybe that's what my bear's up to... maybe he's getting sick.

Following my even more normal routine, I canceled my plans for the afternoon. I don't think anyone will ever fully understand how painful it is to make plans, knowing good and well there's a 95% chance, that those plans will be canceled. Especially since I canceled plans last time. Especially since I've already canceled future plans. Guess who got to cash in our their Bon Jovi ticket insurance because they aren't going anymore? That's right, y'all. It's me.

Every thing in this world that made me normal or made me love life, has been canceled.

I canceled today on going out to this new coffee shop I heard of. I. Alex Tomlinson. Canceled on coffee.

I canceled a concert I desperately wanted to attend because I missed it last year.

I get to sell my Country USA tickets when they arrive in May too.

Not that I love finals or anything, but I'm sure I'll have to cancel important meetings with group members for final projects, or cancel the final and reschedule since you know I've missed god knows how many exams already this semester.

I can probably already say that my hopes and aspirations for this summer, can be canceled. Who wouldn't want to decide not to go see Def Leppard and Journey on the 4th of July?

I can cancel out the idea of trying to find a second job over the summer... I can barely consistently make it to the job I have.

So here's to canceled plans and the interesting connection I seem to share with my bear today. Hopefully he perks up soon.

-A

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Defining "Normal"

I'd be crazy to think that "normal" in terms of life as a disabled migraine patient should look anything like your "normal"... When I say this, I want you to think about your week. For the most part, you work your scheduled days, enjoy your weekends, and absolutely dread waking up on a Monday morning. That's your routine. Even as a student, Monday's are dreadful and suddenly you're halfway through the semester wondering how on Earth you've gone this many weeks and how this new semester's routine became so normal so fast. Each day brings a new attitude, because each day is closer to the weekend or a fun event. I have to admit, with football season pretty much being over, I don't know what day it is 99% of the time. That's crazy right? I think it is. My "days" exist in a bubble of I took medicine two days ago, so even though I need some today, I have to wait until tomorrow. I leave my medication on my counte...

Tips and Tricks: Migraines Without Meds

We've all got that one thing that we know will make us be more comfortable, more ourselves. That little something we feel gives us an edge in whatever we're doing. It's that red pair of shoes that'll make us stand out from the crowd because there really isn't a wrong time to wear them, but they certainly aren't expected. It's that lucky pair of socks. It's the green scarf. It's our lucky pen. We want to be comfortable. But, when we've got outside forces controlling a pulsing sensation in our heads, comfort is about as far away as the sun we're desperately trying to avoid. And if you're in my position, reaching for the bottle of pain killers isn't always the right choice. To be completely honest, my pain meds scare me. Every time I get into some trance while I'm on them. Every time I feel myself coming down. Every time the pain sneaks back in. Some days I convince myself that the medication simply wore off and the br...

The Time We Take

Life's made up of moments. Or at least that's the idea. When everything is all said and done those moments will float back through our mind. Certainly makes you stop and think for a second about what kind of moments we hope make it to our highlight reel. Maybe it stops us in our tracks because we open up Instagram only to see everyone else's highlight reel. We forget that their reels are full of moments we'll never understand, and we get stuck in this place where we're convinced that we aren't doing enough, or aren't doing the right things with our lives. Maybe you can pick out those moments that you wish could live on forever, even though there isn't a photo to have captured it and locked it in time. Maybe you've still got some old photo albums laying around full of memories and long lost friends. One of the things I'm striving for this year is to capture those moments. To live in them. So often, I'm so buried in pain or end...