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Night And Day


I ordered shitty Chinese food, but the fortune makes me think the Chinese gods are trying to tell me something.

Don't know what but something.

Anyway, one thing that always is hard for me is this idea that I'm going to have plans or that somethings going to get done during x amount of free time.

People are constantly asking "oh got any plans for the rest of the day" or "doing anything fun on your days off?"

I've had two days off in a row. God bless.

First thing yesterday morning I got up and went to check my car into the dealership to get work done. I didn't have my car back until mid-afternoon. Yet, it was surprising that I didn't then go grocery shopping.

Today, I had physical therapy at 8 AM, followed by massage therapy at 10AM, and my groceries were ready to pick up right before noon.

I have the whole rest of the day to do whatever my heart desires.

But you see, two days in a row, I've gotten up much earlier than I would on a day off. So, there's no question in needing a nap mid day if I hope to be somewhat functioning by dinnertime.

But, I've also exerted all the energy I have.

People don't get that. People don't understand why I have these 6-10 hour chunks of my day not scheduled.

I felt great this morning. It's a gorgeous day out. I drove from destination to destination with my music blasting, windows down, and not a care in the world that the sun was shining.

Now there's sharp pains stabbing me all over my head.

So, I'll nap.

I got my groceries put away, and tonight I've planned a pretty easy meal with minimal prep. While that's cooking I'll use that time and the energy saved up for then, to package out the meats I bought so they can be frozen in proper portion sizes.

But, I won't do my laundry.

I mean I can't. The washer broke. The room smells like dead rotting animals. I have no quarters. I also have like 3 or 4 loads of laundry to do, and I just don't feel like breaking up a nap to stand in that awful smelling room.

The thing is. I didn't want to have plans these two days I had off. I worked over 40 hours last week (as a part time employee). I'm exhausted. My body is exhausted.

The idea of trying to save energy and missing important appointments doesn't interest me.

I need rest days.

I need to sleep all night and then spend half of the day lounging on the couch not doing much of anything.

That's how I make it through long weeks.

If I don't take it easy some days, I'll die everyday.

So I never know what to say to people when they ask what I've got planned.

I don't make plans.

A.

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